Shop Forum More Submit  Join Login
Tape it Back Together by yuumei Tape it Back Together by yuumei
My family has a complicated history of separation, immigration, divorce, and remarriage. I won't go into the details but my mom often said to me "It's my life, my choice, I do what I want. You have no right to judge me."

I'm 18, but as a 9 year old child at the time, I couldn't repeat what she said. I could only wonder "Your choice in life affects me too."

Divorce is such a fad these days. Half the people I know have divorced parents, and most of them aren't happy about it. I understand in some situations divorce is the only way, but when your choice affects more than just you, think of the consequences and choose wisely.

With that said, I also wrote a short visual novel about the subject and an interactive narrative .
Add a Comment:
 
:iconpinkujessy:
PinkuJessy Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2018  Hobbyist
This hit me deep ;_;
Reply
:iconsoapdraws:
SoapDraws Featured By Owner Nov 11, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
This is a beautiful artwork. But... This must be really heart breaking for parents who are getting divorced. They don't have intentions to hurt their children, but they can't live a lie, pretend to love someone that they don't. 
Reply
:iconlablass-2882:
Lablass-2882 Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2017  Student Artisan Crafter
I've seen both sides of this argument.  A few of my friends who grew up in separated households did it right; where the parents agreed that the children's happiness was the most important thing and tried to get along for their sake.  And I've seen it done wrong; with some very nasty divorces and a lot of late nights trying to comfort a friend who's whole world was falling apart. It makes me even more thankful that my own parents have stay so strong thought out the years.  Even with all the shit that my grandparents gave them about religion; they stay strong and are still together after 30 years of marriage.   I do agree that divorce has become a fad, and I think that its awful that it has.  Your choices are more powerful then you think. 
Reply
:iconcodebreak33:
Codebreak33 Featured By Owner Oct 9, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
This sounds so sweet.
Reply
:icons-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d:
s-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
a beautiful piece, in honesty, though i cannot relate since my parents' divorce was not so shattering as much as a relief, and my mother is much happier after it.
Reply
:iconharmonystar4813:
Harmonystar4813 Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2017
my parents divorced when i was 2 months old.
Reply
:iconzapper133:
Zapper133 Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2017
I first saw this piece when I was 17. My parents had been going through some rough times; they'd talked about divorce on several occasions since I was little. They have separated about three times in the past 25 years, but the actual divorce never happened. Still, it effected me to this very day. This piece is so true, more so for the children going through divorce today. 
Reply
:iconbjpafa:
bjpafa Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2017
A tragic situation has occurred. Sometimes I think that one of my daughters hides such a feeling... Maybe the sadness is my projection...
Reply
:iconsinchanpelman:
Sinchanpelman Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2017
I agree with you... Divorce is such a fad these days. I am lucky that my parents haven't divorced. 
When I see a lot of couples and compare I can see different levels of love, but as much as the couple is united spiritually (they care for each other and love deeply, not careing that much for differences), the more the marriage lasts.
Reply
:iconsinchanpelman:
Sinchanpelman Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2017
But no matter what, parents must think always how their children feel. They have no excuse to say "it's my life", because they are the ones who took you in this world, and the most important persons. They have responsibilities!
Reply
:icons-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d:
s-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
so the woman getting yelled at for being in a car crash instead of being asked if she was alright must stay with her husband for the kids' feelings? cut me a break, divorcees have enough to worry about without people blaming them for their childrens' feelings, especially because sometimes these parents spends hundreds to give that child therapy on the divorce.
Reply
:iconsinchanpelman:
Sinchanpelman Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2017
I honestly think no married couples should divorce (except in case of domestic violence or an illegitimate relationship), first of all because the step of marriage is something really serious if two persones take the decision to spend their lives toghether, and of course the persons are fully conscious of it, and even more if they got children, because their marriage has the "seal" to have brought a life to the world. Besides I think those therapies (for what close friends have told me) do not always work, and you can't reproach the child for the hundreds spent for it, if the own parent brought him to the situation. If my parents got divorced I wouldn't like them to just pay me a therapy and that's it...
Reply
:icons-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d:
s-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
of course that's not it, but living in a household were there is constant arguments or simply tension is much less healthy than being with parents part time for most. i can't speak for everyone, but parents generally wait until there are no other options to divorce, even if there isnt full-scale abuse, their mental health matters too.

(i do hope i'm not botheringn you here, sorry!)
Reply
:iconsinchanpelman:
Sinchanpelman Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2017
Oh no no, don't worry! We are just sharing opinions :)

Well, in my case my parents don't use to discuss (sometimes they do for not really serious stuff), but when they do in a hardcore way, they try to put a solution (I really insist on that ^^', I don't like when they are not in peace with each other). I can remmember a time when they had arguments for a long time (they even mentioned divorce), and it was for familiar issues (still now these are problematic), and sometimes it comes out the same theme but they try to talk calmly to see what things can be changed from their behaviour. I'm still not married so I can't really speak of that for expirience xD but I think divorce is such a misfortune and it should be the last thing if you feel lied or betrayed by the other person... I wish arguments couldn't finish no one's marriage. I insist, I don't know your case or anyone
Reply
:icons-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d:
s-t-a-r-c-h-i-l-d Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
true, but sometimes a marriage will simply be uncomfortable and/or tense and just wont work out. it is often hard on the kids, but i personally believe it is better to see what an ideal relationship is growing up and not a tense one, which is what they would witness before a divorce

(that's good, don't want to be starting any arguments heh)
Reply
:iconsinchanpelman:
Sinchanpelman Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2017
Yeah, I agree that a good example is the best for the kids. If it is posible to not divorce and have a good marriage (even with some arguments,but not always) then that's the ideal I would follow :)
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconsinchanpelman:
Sinchanpelman Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2017
*anyone's, so I'm just saying what I think about the matter :)
Reply
:icona-cloudy-cat:
A-Cloudy-Cat Featured By Owner Jun 19, 2017  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You make me cry... this is my same situation... even if now that I'm 19-20, my hate and my fear for the concept of "family" is still growing...
Reply
:iconstrike-stripe:
strike-stripe Featured By Owner Jun 25, 2017  Hobbyist
I'm 23 now. My parents was going through divorce when I was in middle school all the way till my first year in college. Now they're able to have a conversation. But my view on making a family never changed. Yes the divorce effected me but not in a way to make me think marriage was a terrible idea. I'm married now(newly wed) and my view is to keep me and my husband happy and together. You shouldn't fear the concept of "family". You and your partner dictated how your family is. When you fear for your future because of a past event that you were in but not the cause of you're only setting yourself back. Your parents divorce does not dictate your future relationship(s) and/or marriage(s).

I encourage you to let past events be past events. You don't have to forget but its not healthy to let those things be apart of any relationships that you have with anybody. It's not fair to you or anyone else and the more you hold on to that hate and fear eventually you're going to push people who truly care and love you away. Be encourage because there is truly nothing to fear.
Reply
:icona-cloudy-cat:
A-Cloudy-Cat Featured By Owner Jun 25, 2017  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I would, but sometimes I fear the fact that we could have a child and I don't wan to do to him or her the same things. I was 4 when this happened,and even now that I'm 19 there are still problem within my parents and I'm tired to know that they still not understand that I need peace, that they should solve their problem between them, but they do not.
I just want to hope that my future will be better.
Reply
:iconstrike-stripe:
strike-stripe Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2017  Hobbyist
Of course your future will be better. Your 19 now, a few more years your're going to be living on your own, in a apartment, house, or with some friends/roommates. Your're old enough to move out but don't do it if your're not financially stable. You really should just focus on yourself and your future. Have a talk with your parents. Tell them how you were affected by the situation and how you feel about it. 15 years have passed i assume, since the problem have happened. What ever it was it was bad enough that one of your parents felt so hurt and betrayed that they refuse to forgive their spouse and thus just probably hate them. Thats something only them and them alone can fix. They have to truly forgive first in their heart to move past their problem. But that doesn't mean they'll will get back together. They could just leave everything on good terms. It's good that you care so much about your parents.  
Reply
:icona-cloudy-cat:
A-Cloudy-Cat Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2017  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I know. At the moment I'm studying hoping to find a job that I like.
But my parents...
my mother is really kind, she always try to help, to encourage me, but she became a monster when my father do something stupid.
They divorced because my father was full of debts, and now that I'm 19 and I'm trying to save moneys, someone says that if my father will not pay, I will, even if we live in two different sides of Italy and I never see him.
The thing I fear the most to have a family one day BUT to spend all my money for a father who have never helped me
But, I will try to think only about me and my mom.

Thanks for your words.
Reply
:iconstrike-stripe:
strike-stripe Featured By Owner Jun 27, 2017  Hobbyist
I wish you the best of luck and you're welcome
Reply
:iconairshooter:
airshooter Featured By Owner May 30, 2017
wow ;-;
Reply
:iconthe-cloaked-one:
The-Cloaked-One Featured By Owner May 17, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Been there. Felt that. The tears never quite fade do they?
Reply
:iconmalatale:
MalaTale Featured By Owner May 11, 2017   Digital Artist
Sad ;-;
Reply
:iconsilencedbook9:
Silencedbook9 Featured By Owner May 3, 2017  Student Writer
Hugs you tightly. 
Reply
:iconsurizarin:
Surizarin Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2017  Student General Artist
Dammit, this gave me feels
Reply
:iconlilravo13:
lilravo13 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2017  Student Artist
*Hugs the child*
Reply
:iconhowdoidothis01:
howdoidothis01 Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2017
Ah but that is where mom is wrong, Once accepted the responsibility. The choices also must include the children too. Your not really an adult but just a child playing grown up. Your own personal happiness must stop the moment you choose to bring others into the situation. If you can't accept that then don't take on the mantle of either adulthood or worse parenthood.
Reply
:iconakatsukisakura001:
akatsukisakura001 Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm tearing up over this...
Reply
:iconnightengale1028:
nightengale1028 Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2017
devorce. I have felt the ups and downs....the fear. and on the edge of mentaly shutting down as a person. 


Devorce is not bad nor good. it is simply just. true people devorce a lot more than before but thats because people rush in and with a persentage of not trying to fix things. others simply fall out of love.

My parents are falling out of love. I see them try. but two diffrent people. who love there children very much. just. fell out of it. both still like one another but...there is nothing. sometimes they are bitter and mean. other times they dance and love on one another. Love is a strange thing like that. but to force two people who dont wnat to be together. only bad things happen. and misery insures. 
Reply
:iconponepyon:
Ponepyon Featured By Owner Edited Mar 26, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I can relate to this right now, crying and then remember Yuumei's masterpiece. I click on it because I want to be with others who had the same situation like me, then cry again, not only because of sadness, but I'm glad we're not alone.
Reply
:iconrapunxel:
Rapunxel Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2017
Well said. Sad Yes or nod 
Reply
:iconsatinnwolf:
SatinnWolf Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
So true... which is sad...
Reply
:iconcookie-dough-is-good:
Cookie-Dough-Is-Good Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2017  Student Digital Artist
I can totally relate to this. After a fight between my mom, dad, and grandma on Thanksgiving, my mom told me she was divorcing dad. I. Was. Shattered. As much as Dad had betrayed us by 1. locking his credit card for us and 2. cheating on Mom, I still miss the nights when he would lay in bed with me. I miss his presence on the holidays. I love my mom more than him, but I miss him. I just wanted a happy family, but it went the opposite direction. I just want the old days of my family back. I am crying right now as I type this. By the time you get this, I will be in my bedroom crying.
Reply
:iconagraellps:
AgraelLPS Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I...



I just hope you feel better now :-3

Sorry...Even though I can't help...I wish you and your family a happy ending,that's all I can do,but I'm gonna do it while I can :tighthug: :tighthug: :tighthug:
Reply
:iconcookie-dough-is-good:
Cookie-Dough-Is-Good Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2017  Student Digital Artist
Thank you! :hug:
It's gotten better now. They're still divorced, but I am now living with my dad. It's much happier at his house. :)
Reply
:iconagraellps:
AgraelLPS Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Aaaw...No problem,I'm glad to know it's way better!Stay happy and be careful <3
Reply
:iconcookie-dough-is-good:
Cookie-Dough-Is-Good Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2017  Student Digital Artist
:)
Reply
:iconhipsterpotato:
HipsterPotato Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
Sad 
Reply
:iconsabje:
sabje Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
wauw love it :D 
Reply
:iconrainbowtohell:
rainbowtohell Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2016  Professional General Artist
<3 Thank you for creating and sharing this. Many people understand what it feels like but can never find the words or the right visualization.
Reply
:iconbluesnowdrops13:
bluesnowdrops13 Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2016
This kicked me in the feels so bad... :'(
Reply
:iconerenxrivaille:
erenxrivaille Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2016
Really Sad :cry: I am not okay
Reply
:iconcool103:
cool103 Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2016  Student Artist
i feel sad now Pearl Emote 10 You Broke Chica's Heart (Chat Icon) Deku Link SAD. 
Reply
:icongreyjay254:
GreyJay254 Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2016  Student Digital Artist
This is such a well done gorgeous piece, with such a deep meaning
and yes i'm crying too
Reply
:iconsgpotter:
SGPotter Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2016
My fuckin couch is soaked with tears.
Reply
:iconwintersong12:
WinterSong12 Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
wow...
Reply
:iconboopmaster112:
boopmaster112 Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Pikachu Crying Plz Pikachu Crying Plz Pikachu Crying Plz Pikachu Crying Plz I'M CRYING AND I CAN'T FUCKING STOP 
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×
  • Photo


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
March 6, 2009
Image Size
4.5 MB
Resolution
2000×4333
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
1,203,006 (13 today)
Favourites
66,046 (who?)
Comments
9,912
×